Hotel california....

As Helga would say "I'm back.............................."
But briefly. I have started my residential again for the second half of my qualification of becoming a bone fide Chelsea Bun regulator. Briefly, last year I did the foundation that covered civil law, criminal law and consumer protection and this year I am specialising. To qualify, I need to obtain 40 points and its ten points a unit, with metrology a meaty 20 points. So obviously doing metrology, I have just got back from my product safety course and I am also doing consumer credit. So if you buy a short weight loaf with an unsafe free gift and for what ever reasons decide to buy it on your credit card that subsequently changes its terms - I am your woman!

Last year I want to Hotel X that my legal advisor Helen Forrest QC of Forrest, Forrest and Allie has reminded me not to actually name. Anyway it was an independent hotel more of a motel in Somerset that suffered myriad unfortunate events. In short, and remember I went in the cold months

• Refusal to turn on central heating
• no hot water
• power showers that were a struggle to actually get wet under
• broken plug sockets with exposed wires covered in cling film
• Insect invasions - I got ants, a friend had a nest of some kind and most were blessed with well established spider communities.

It’s not its fault, but the place smelt like poo. It was rammed with mismatched furniture, staffed with the local grumpy inbreeds and vegetarianism was an exotic concept occasionally whispered about but never said out loud. And no scrumpy. In Somerset. with no scrumpy. Very strange. This course I have opted for a south east learning provider and the course is set in a well known hotel chain which if I said you are going to be staying in XXXX - you would think - nice, consistent, clean all good.

Oh, how I miss somerset!!! I have only been there three days but even still the similarities are disturbing - why is it Trading Standard courses can not choose decent accommodation? Is it an on going practical I wonder? Anyho, the absence of the obligatory biscuits and hot chocolate sachets were noted in the room, as was no heating and broken air con in other rooms. Vegetarianism, to get back to that subject, now - is it that hard? I know it’s a personal choice but as more and more people recognise food allergies - who can forget the aftermath of Amy's yeast infection - is it that hard to cater for? Leaving meat out of food and coming up with an alternative as sorts - is it that hard? Apparently so - I had a dried bean wrap (sounds good - was not!), pasta with burnt bread crumbs, a ploughman’s as a main meal.... peppers stuffed with vegetables. Actually this all sounds nice - but be assured - it was not! Anyway, I am briefly back and glad to be home to Helga and her drama. I am away again next week but more prepared for what’s in store. I hope all are well.

Kat x